It’s important for older adults and families to discuss the possibility of fraud. But before you broach the topic, know that elder fraud can be a sensitive issue for some. Not sure where to start? Our tips and conversation starters can help.
Elder fraud is a growing problem — and families are understandably concerned.
In January of 2022, we conducted a study with families on digital safety. Of those surveyed, nearly 60% said they felt worried about an aging parent falling victim to identity theft, or being tricked by a scammer.
So, how can you help an older loved one stay safe?
“If you’re a caregiver, one of the best things you can do is talk about fraud and scams with your older loved one,” says Vera Tolmachoff, Restoration Manager at Allstate Identity Protection.
Before you broach the topic, though, consider that elder fraud can be a sensitive issue. With that in mind, we’ve compiled a quick list of tips and conversation starters to help guide you.
Tell them you care
The goal is to empower your loved one by sharing information, Tolmachoff says. But be mindful of how you deliver the message. Some may bristle at unsolicited advice, at least initially. To diffuse any tension, lead with saying how much you care. (“I recently read that online fraud is on the rise. I care about you, so I want to make sure you’re aware.”) From there, you can move into specifics. (“I want to talk about some common scams that are out there, just so you can be safe.”) Perhaps mention that you saw a news segment or read an article — like this one! — that inspired you to have this chat.
Talk through common scams
Next, Tolmachoff recommends talking through a few specific scam types — like government imposter scams, for example. Start by describing what fraudsters are up to. (“There are individuals who pretend to be from the IRS or the Social Security Administration. They’ll call and say they’ll freeze your Social Security number or stop your Social Security checks if you don’t give them personal information or payment — but that’s not true.”) Then, assure your loved one that these agencies would never call, and certainly would not request sensitive information over the phone. For a list of common elder fraud schemes to know about, visit the Federal Bureau of Investigation.
Don’t dwell on age
It’s true that when older people fall victim to scams, they tend to lose a high dollar amount. But millennials are actually more likely to report losing money to fraud than older generations, according to the Federal Trade Commission. Bottom line? “Fraud impacts people of all ages — we see that every day,” Tolmachoff says. Because it can and does happen to anyone, your loved one’s age doesn’t need to be the focus of the conversation, which may help reduce friction.
List your non-negotiables
Conclude your chat by agreeing on a few best practices that everyone in the family should follow. Tolmachoff offers these ideas as starting points — but recommends working collaboratively with your loved ones to make the list your own:
If you don’t recognize a phone number, don’t answer. If you’ve already answered and the caller asks sensitive questions or requests personal information, hang up the phone. If hanging up feels rude, talk about alternatives. One idea is to say, “I’ll do some research,” and then end the call.
If a stranger knocks on your door, be wary. Unexpected visitors who say they’re offering a product or service should never be allowed in your home.
Don’t accept social media friend requests from people you don’t know. Remember that people aren’t always who they say they are online. And don’t ever share personal or payment information through social media.
By regularly discussing common fraud types and how to avoid them, you can help family members of all ages stay a step ahead.
